While I thought getting into Harvard was one of the most prestigious things to ever happen to me, the sheer joy and ecstasy I experienced when I was accepted into Mather House (known to true Matherites as Mather University) was truly forever life changing. While the weak weep because they cannot handle the prospect of having the best housing on campus, my block mates and I rejoiced with MatherBucks, whipped cream, and awesome Mather shades. How could we not, I mean singles for all three years?! A large common room fit for only the best of Bacchanalian affairs if you live in the low-rise?!?! A fantastic view of the Charles River and Boston if you life in the tower!?!?!?!? How can living in such refinement appall any first-year?
While Mather is the river house that is the farthest away from the Yard, we do boast our own shuttle that comes frequently. Mather also has the best dining hall on campus. Not only do we have a glorious view of the Charles River, our food is on point. Mather and Dunster share a kitchen and aren’t subjected to large HUDS food-vat concoctions; each meal is prepared specially and lovingly by the best dining hall staff on campus. Whether Ms. Michelle is checking in individually with each student, Betty is smiling as she swipes your card, or Juana is making sure that everyone is repping the Yankees in some form or fashion, all of the Mather dining hall staff are incredibly friendly and help turn Mather House in a home. Mather’s Friday night brain breaks also come in clutch.
Other houses put their students through mental and emotional anxiety during the housing lottery each spring. Students manipulate and cajole each other in order to get rooms that are only marginally better. In Mather, there are no losers in the housing lottery. Everyone is happy (but usually not alone wink, wink) in his or her own single. In addition to swanky singles, Matherites are treated to its own private art gallery, gym, wood working shop, tranquility room, and multiple study rooms. Matherites can also leave their mark by adding the collection of paintings and tiles found in Mather’s tunnels.
Even though all of the praise I lay upon Mather may not quell the doubt non-believers carry, I know that Mather’s impressive history will shut the mouths of all the haters. Besides being the home of Conan O’Brien and Cornel West, is Harvard’s newest dorm. Mather was also the progenitor of the Housing Day dorm storm tradition and epic housing day videos (see “My House [Mather House],” “Concrete Seduction,” and “Talk Mather To Me”). It is completely evident that Mather’s house spirit and is unparalleled. Being in Mather is like being with all of your closest friends and family.
And the biggest perk about living in Mather is definitely all of the amazing parties. Getting into Mather House is like getting punched and making through all the rounds of the best final club (except, without you know, all of the judgment and biddies). The most legendary (and notorious) of parties is Mather Lather. You get to be all sudsy and slippery with hundreds of your closest friends. Attending this party is definitely of must-do at Harvard.
If this snapshot into the epic life you would live in Mather isn’t enough to convince you of our glory, you are probably too lame to be able to enjoy all of the awesome perks of being in Mather. You should probably end up in a house like Dunster or Winthrop.